RIP.ie

 

I, unfortunately have unwanted guests for Christmas.

Now before you get all charitable and say that this time of year is when we should show mercy to all creatures, let me just point out that...

One little fu*ker bit a tiny hole on the pipe leading from my dishwasher, it dripped onto the plug underneath, tripped all the electrics in the house JUST IN TIME or my whole house would have gone up in flames!

Christmas spirit, me @rse!!!

Anyway, I hotfooted it down to Weir's, my local shop and asked for 

"Two mouse traps. please."

Now, I know I have a Westmeath accent, but years of teaching has perfected my skills of articulation, projection and annunciation, resulting in a clear speaking voice...or so I thought.

The young chap went rooting around behind the counter and produced, with a flourish

"Two MASS CARDS, wasn't it?"

I looked at him in confusion for a moment and then said

"No, it was two MOUSETRAPS. But if they work, I'll come back for the mass cards!"

Update: They DID work :)